#11 about tommy

11. he downloaded "my only wish" by jessica simpson from itunes yesterday and we've already listened to it 3 times.

(don't judge us too harshly. it was free. and we don't have that much christmas music.)

11:28 round 2

we ran a race earlier this year back in utah and tommy somehow got assigned number 1. he's #1! he's #1!

10. tommy loves seeing 10:12 twice a day. every day. of our lives. until we die.

9. he loves hp (almost) as much as i do.

8. he wants to be a luthier when he grows up.

7. i gave him a popcorn air popper for his birthday. because he loves popcorn just that much. (non-microwave, though.)

6. we are also considering buying tickets to the temptations and four tops concert in durham in february and counting it as part of his birthday celebration. because he loves the temptations (and the four tops). a lot.

5. he loves the count of monte cristo so much that he's currently 900 pages into the almost-1300-page unabridged version.

4. it was his idea that we dress up as harry and hermione for halloween. it was also his idea that we dress up for the midnight showing. (you didn't think so, did you?)

3. he pronounces pulitzer "puh-litzer." i pronounce it "pyoo-litzer." it's a major source of contention between us.

2. he's funny. here's an example: he sent me this in an email a few weeks ago (talking about the high school musical we were going to see) and it made me laugh. it's still making me laugh right now:

apparently friday is gala night, which means there will be free apples, i think.

1. why, yes. it's his birthday today! he gets older and older every year . . . he's 26 now. and i will tell you--he is the bomb.com.

celebrating his bday earlier this week while my family was here. note how we didn't have cake candles so we just surrounded the cake with whatever candles we had around the apartment.

thanksgiving partay

two great things i was thankful about this past week:

1. my great cousin scott and his even greater fiancee kate came down from CT and VA to our first official duke basketball game with us. it was awesome. and clearly duke crushed colgate . . . probably due to their humiliation from the ridiculous toothpaste-based jokes all the students had on signs throughout the stadium.

2. my familia came for a week. needless to say, it was very much appreciated to have my mom here to help with a very wonderful thanksgiving dinner (we found a to-die-for stuffing recipe) but it was even better just to have them here visiting and getting to know our place here. we took them to see nc state and duke and took some family pictures of us all wearing gear from those respective schools. i don't have very many pictures (most of them are on my mom's camera) but here is one of us in front of the (closed) raleigh temple, and of the three thanksgiving pie masters.

dallin and tommy were very proud of their pies and very competitive as to whose was better. luckily, they were both excellent (although i am partial to dallin's banana cream chocolate pie myself--but don't tell tommy).

such a wonderful break to have them here. now tommy and i are trying really hard to finish our final papers and projects before we leave in ten days to go to utah for melissa's wedding and christmas! (no big deal.)

something to be grateful for

"There is much that I do not know. I do not know the details of the organization of matter into the beautiful world we live in. I do not understand the intricacies of the Atonement, how the Savior’s sacrifice can cleanse all repentant people, or how the Savior could suffer “the pain of all men” (D&C 18:11). I do not know where the city of Zarahemla was, as referred to in the Book of Mormon. I do not know why my beliefs sometimes conflict with assumed scientific or secular knowledge. Perhaps these are matters our Father in Heaven described as the “mysteries . . . of heaven” (D&C 107:19) that will be revealed at a later date.

But while I don’t know everything, I know the important. I know the plain and simple gospel truths that lead to salvation and exaltation. I know that the Savior did suffer the pain of all men and that all repentant people can be cleansed from sin. And what I don’t know or don’t completely understand, with the powerful aid of my faith, I bridge the gap and move on, partaking of the promises and blessings of the gospel."

-Bishop Richard C. Edgley, Faith--the Choice Is Yours

i think this is exactly right. and goes exactly with many of my thoughts of late.

yes, we did.

in case you were wondering.

90% work

before class yesterday, this guy in my linguistics class said,

"one time, i met an architect. and i told him, 'wow, i've always thought it would be fun to be an architect.' and the architect said, 'yeah, i thought it would be too--but it turns out that just like everything else, it's about 90% work.' and that's what i've found out about everything--i took this class because i thought linguistics would be fun, but turns out it's about 90% work."

i keep seeing these cool and amazing opportunities for education everywhere that i want to do after i graduate. (a master's in publishing? cool! a master's in library science? isn't being a librarian what i'm totally cut out to be anyways? cool!) and then i have to remind myself that i'm only just barely getting myself to care about and do all the work for the master's that i'm in. and even though they look like they'd be a lot of fun--they're probably just 90% work.

you just have to decide if all the work is worth the 10% fun you have left.

thank you, technology

for providing skype so that we can talk to our families and see their lovely faces and meet our lovely little twins.


we remembered about the joys of skype the other day and were finally able to meet leif and joel via the internet. (we will actually meet them in less than a month!) and we got to talk to my family too. i wish we'd taken a screen shot of talking to them, but we didn't. but they'll be here in four days anyways, so no worries.

i know it's a bad picture . . . but aren't they beautiful???

top 10 things that are different from byu at nc state

since i'm one of about 3 people who have gone to nc state after graduating from byu, i feel like i'm qualified to make a few distinctions between the two schools. i imagine that nc state is pretty representative of public universities across the u.s., while we all know that byu is not representative of really anyplace else. so some of the things that have been a surprise to me since transferring schools:

1. the smokers.

2. their library not only allows food, it has a food court AND a coffee shop AND a creamery, all within the walls of the library. it's also open 24 hours and is 12 stories tall. bomb.

3. everybody actually uses umbrellas when it rains. i don't think i ever once used an umbrella at byu, but everyone here uses theirs. weird. also, everyone wears rainboots. also weird.

4. nobody wears headphones when they're walking to class. nobody. just me.

5. the professors swearing. it's actually hilarious.

6. the facial hair. one of my professors looks like abraham with a ponytail. and half the guys in my classes have grande beards.

7. bruegger's bagels right across the street from my building. bad news bears for our bank account . . . because i love bagels.

8. the free expression tunnel. cool, right? can you imagine byu doing something like that? no. i'm thinking that this might be my chance to do the graffiti i've been longing to do all my life.

9. they had ludacris perform at their homecoming concert in 2004. again, not byu's style.

10. this guy. hahahahaha.

yeah.

sometimes i make to-do lists to act like i'm being productive, and then i actually put things that i've already completed on the list to act like i'm being even more productive.

i just did it. really.

but then, doesn't everyone do that? i hope so.

FAME

i am lucky to have a mom who is the best piano player in the world. it's true, really; just ask the primary presidency and every member of our ward who wants to do a musical number. she can sight-read everything and play anything. some of the best memories from when i was a kid involve us sitting around her, belting out a song while she played it on the piano.

one of these beloved songs was FAME from FAME the musical (it must be written in all caps, come on). do you not know it? here's a clip. the original 80s version is way cooler, but there isn't a very good youtube clip with it.

isn't it great? it makes me just want to shout "FAME!" at random intervals throughout my conversations all day.

so when we saw that hillside high school was doing FAME for their musical on friday, we had to go. because of how much i love this song. we didn't know anything about the rest of the songs, the plot line, or hillside high school. (although tommy did look at the school's website and see that their theater program is "recognized both nationally and internationally.")

it was a disappointment. the sound was bad, the singing was bad, the acting was bad. so we left halfway through (they didn't even have an intermission so we had to sneak out in the dark after one of the [failed] songs.) and went to go get cold stone to make up for the $20 (!!) we spent on a fruitless evening. but it was a good adventure. we are planning to get the movie from the library to make up for missing the rest of it.

for future reference, though: don't count on a high school musical for friday night entertainment. especially not when you're biased by having been at byu, with its awesome mdt program, for the past four years.

prop 8

i don't usually write about things like this on this blog. i don't usually want people to take me seriously (eg, the blog title, no capitalizing, etc.). but now i'm going to school at a non-lds university, and the topic of gay marriage comes up weekly, and i sit trembling every time in case a pointed jab comes up that i have to respond to, knowing that i am the only person from california, the only person who voted on prop 8, and probably the only person who would have voted (and did vote) for it. i figured i needed to write this down (so i could know what i thought and so that i could be like my good friend sarah, who wrote about this a while ago and has made me think about it ever since). and something like this, in order to be honest, needs an audience. i'm not writing this to try and convince anyone that i'm right, though--don't take it that way. this is for me to establish what i believe, for myself and for anyone who cares. so you know, any responses (positive or negative) will be appreciated. as long as they're not hating.

it's been plaguing me for months. really, ever since we moved out of happyland provo and into the real world (like i'd been wanting to for months and years). i knew it was going to come up eventually (and again and again)--and i didn't know how to explain it. how can you explain the church's standpoint on gay marriage to a non-religious person, or to someone who stands squarely against you, firmly convinced that they're right and you're wrong? and personally, i haven't always been convinced that i'm right. i still don't even know. i've always been bad at taking responsibility for my political beliefs because i never think i'm informed enough and could never withstand close questioning or attacking. and this issue is particularly difficult for me for a number of reasons. i've ignored and avoided, protested and deliberated, and finally pondered. this resolution is not a matter of blind submission on an issue i know nothing about, but a conscious decision balanced on my intellectual beliefs and faith.

but as far as i can tell and as far as i believe, my views on the issue (not saying that this is the whole LDS church's view) stand like this: like the proclamation on the family says, marriage is ordained between a man and a woman. God created us, his children, to procreate and have families--and that can only happen between a man and a woman. i don't know why there are people who are gay, lesbian, bi, or transsexual. i know that a huge part of this issue is whether queer people choose their sexuality or whether they come out that way--i don't have the answer to that and i'm not going to try. however, it remains that in the scriptures and in modern revelation from our prophets and apostles, homosexuality is a sin and against the commandments of God. and, like in nephite times in the book of mormon, we need to guard against the laws of our country becoming corrupted and condoning sin (helaman 5:2). so, as a church, and for me as an individual, we voted to keep the definition of marriage as being solely between a man and a woman.

i am well aware that such an argument would hold little water with someone who is not religious, and that it would infuriate and convince others that i am as full of hatred towards gay people as some of those horrible, evil, twisted people who protest at gay soldiers' funerals. but it's simply not true--i absolutely do not hate any group of people, especially one who is so unfairly maligned as this one. i don't want to deny anybody the chance of the happiness that marriage brings and i don't find joy in the trials that LGBT people have in attaining the same goals that i have. it hurts and sickens me to have to make this distinction. (that's why it's taken me so long, really.)

but as much as i firmly believe in equal rights for everyone, and as much as it hurts to be classed with the ignorant bigots who hate LGBT people and who would define them as a lower class of people, i also believe in revelation from our prophet today. i believe that this issue is so difficult because it is so important--the LDS leaders would not have spoken out about such a political issue if it weren't. as tommy said the other day as we were discussing this, if we (as mormons) really believe that our church is the one true church on the earth, led by God's one mouthpiece, isn't that really all we need to know? (although, disclaimer: i don't think that should be an excuse to follow blindly without deciding what you believe for yourself.)

so i've really decided which side i'm going to stand on. finally.


edit: kylie sent me this link to the church's response to the human rights campaign after elder packer's talk at gc. it is awesome. and says a lot of what i was trying to say as well.

this is grad school?

i only had 2 classes to go to this week. like, 2 class periods. everything else was canceled. (or i ditched. don't blame me, it was my class on BIBLIOGRAPHY. some people might not know how to use mla format, but i've been doing it since i was 14 years old. i DESERVE to ditch that class.)

and i've already gone to them. the rest of the week is empty. and i've spent all evening wasting time on the computer while tommy works hard on his homework. because i don't really have anything to do.

i'm not complaining or anything . . . but i sure wish this semester were over already.

but, listen to this and let it make you happy. it's my ringtone for when tommy calls. perfect, right?

i can't help myself!

writing

sometimes i hate school. i hoped that starting grad school would mean harder/more interesting classes that would MAKE me like them, but that really didn't happen. (maybe next semester? i never give up hope.) it's times like this that make me really really glad that i'm not signed up for a six- to seven-year phd program and just a two-year master's instead. (i just know i'll be glad i did this master's someday. even if i sometimes hate it now.)

BUT I WILL SAY that i am very. very. VERY appreciative of what i have learned at school. and the best things that i've learned (in a very general sense) are

1. how to think
2. how to write.

a few weeks ago, i was contemplating what would happen if i decided not to finish this masters (relax, i'm not dropping out, it was a hypothetical question on an evening of procrastination and school-loathing). and i realized i had NO JOB OPTIONS. then i began to appreciate (just a LITTLE TINY BIT) grandpa murphy's constant warnings and jabs about my useless english major over the last four years. (but don't tell him; i don't want to give him the satisfaction.) because i realized, wow, an english major actually IS kind of useless.

but then i thought, no. it's really not. it may be useless in the whole i-know-exactly-what-job-i'm-getting-after-i-graduate world, because of how broad and non-directive it is. but it has NOT been useless because of these two incredibly, extremely useful skills that i've learned and honed and perfected (ha) over the last 4.5 years of my life. of course you learn these skills in other majors. but this is the way that it worked best for me.

anyway, the whole point of all of this is that I AM SO GLAD THAT I KNOW HOW TO WRITE. and no, i don't mean creative writing (i don't do that, not even a little bit)--i mean, real, real writing--expressing myself and arguing something and organizing my thoughts and backing up my ideas and coming to a solid conclusion. i can't make a good argument or explain myself very well in person or through talking, but i can, i really can, when i write it out.

example: a few weeks ago, i wrote an email to a friend. it was a very long email about a very complicated subject. i didn't even know how i felt about the whole topic before i started. but as i wrote and wrote and wrote, the writing figured out my ideas for me and after i finished, i knew what i was thinking. i know there's a quote somewhere that's something like, "how can i know what i'm thinking without seeing what i write?" and it is very. true.

so i guess that's the real reason why i have this blog. and why i've (very recently) started writing in a journal again. and why i'm glad i was an english major. and why i'm going to stop procrastinating and start writing this stupid paper. maybe i'll come up with some ideas as i go.